


Winding Down

by sajastar



Series: Talking to Yourself [2]
Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Arguing, Bodysharing, Compromise, Gen, Movie Night, QPR Eddie Brock/Venom, Slice of Life, qpr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 10:14:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16406495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sajastar/pseuds/sajastar
Summary: Most partners argue over where to eat and what to do on their evening off. Most partners do not consider snacking on kidneys and jumping off buildings as reasonable options. Still, it's true what they say: all relationships are built on compromise.





	Winding Down

**Author's Note:**

> TW - graphic description of death by falling. If you want to skip it, it's one paragraph, between the lines "No harm done" and "You are hurting us."  
> Also, canon-typical mentions of eating internal organs throughout.

Eddie pressed the heel of his hand into his side and begged the elevator to open.

 **WHAT,** Venom asked. It was assumed this was some kind of gesture lost in translation. Was he mad at it?  
Eddie was getting better about picking up Venom’s thoughts.

“Sorry, V, that wasn’t for you, that was… Somethin’s not-right in there,” he muttered quietly. They were alone for now, but no telling when someone would walk around the corner.

 **SOMETHING HURTS?** Venom asked warily.

“Yeah. Kinda all over. God, our hands are shaking” he noticed.

Venom crept into their fingers, wrapping around the phalanges and stabilizing them. I WILL FIX US. The statement was innocuous, but Eddie detected a tinge of… was that guilt? The elevator doors opened. Eddie pushed the button for ground floor.

“V. Did you do something?”

 **I THOUGHT I DISABLED ALL THE NOCICEPTORS,** it admitted. **THE SILENT RECEPTORS MUST HAVE ACTIVATED.**

“The noci—V, you turned off our pain receptors?” Eddie demanded. He had been reading up on human biology a lot recently. It was easier to make sense of the bizarre things Venom felt and tasted when he had words for them.

 **ONLY TEMPORARILY,** Venom mollified. 

The was another wave of dull pain and Eddie leaned back against the wall of the elevator. There was a mirror in the wall opposite him. Their face was drawn and pale. As Mrs. Chen would say, they looked like shit. “Fuck. We need to go lie down.”

**NO! WE NEED FOOD. OTHERWISE I CANNOT FIX US.**

“V—” He didn’t want to ask. If he was wrong, Venom would sulk for days. He had to ask. “V, did you do this?”

 **WE WERE STARVING,** Venom replied apologetically.

“That is _not_ an excuse to _eat_ us!” Eddie shouted. Thank god they were alone in the elevator.

**YOU WOULD NOT LEAVE THE MEETING.**

“I need this job! We’ve talked about this. I can’t be feedin’ you every hour like some overgrown baby.”

 **HOW DO HUMANS WITH BABIES MANAGE?** Venom asked reasonably. 

“Their boss knows they have a baby, and their boss is understanding. Hopefully. Sometimes. Once in blue moon. I cannot tell my boss about you.”

**THEN WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO.**

“Wait!”

**NOT POSSIBLE.**

Eddie wanted to dismiss it as Venom's lack of impulse control, but he sensed the very literal truth of that statement. “I’ll bring more snacks to work.”

**AND LONG MEETINGS?**

“I can’t get away with snacking during these conferences. But they don’t happen very often, and it’s only a few hours.” He got the feeling from Venom that it would still be an issue. 

“You survive fine when we’re asleep.”

 **I USE LESS ENERGY WHEN WE’RE ASLEEP. LIKE HIBERNATION.** It pointed him to the memory of a nature documentary they’d watched the week before, as though Eddie might require proof of concept.

“Then sleep through the meetings.”

**I CANNOT SLEEP WHILE YOU ARE AWAKE.**

They stood at impasse for a moment. The elevator doors opened and Eddie got out. 

**I AM LEARNING. NEXT TIME, I CAN DO IT BETTER. YOU WILL NOT FEEL A THING.**

“I don’t care! Using our organs as your personal fridge is not acceptable!” he hissed, turning his head away from a passing colleague. 

**IT IS LIKE A CAMEL’S HUMP,** Venom remarked, still thinking of the nature documentary.

“If only we were a camel,” Eddie answered snidely.

**IF YOU DO NOT FEEL ANYTHING, AND I FIX US UP GOOD AS NEW, WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?**

“Because—” he couldn’t think of a reason. 

**I WILL ASK FIRST,** the symbiote offered. Humans valued permission. It was always a good go-to when they had a disagreement.

“Fine! Okay, fine.” Fuck, this was a bad idea. Eddie rubbed the bridge of his nose. He didn’t get headaches any more, but it was still a habit. And a gesture Venom recognized.

It offered a wordless apology.

“Don’t apologize if you aren’t sorry,” Eddie warned irritably.

**I AM NOT SORRY FOR EATING US; IT WAS NECESSARY. I AM SORRY FOR CAUSING PAIN.**

“Okay. Apology accepted.” He pushed open the glass door and stepped out into cool winter sunshine. “Well, I guess we have some repair work to do. What are we gettin’ to eat?”

**HEADS.**

“No way.”

**THIS WILL BE DIFFICULT TO FIX WITHOUT HEADS.**

“Fucking hell. Okay. How about a pig head?”

It recognized a compromise when it heard it. **GOOD ENOUGH.**

**~*~**

“Why do we have to come in through the roof?” Eddie complained. He was standing on top of his apartment building holding a bag full of groceries. Well, a bag full of pig organs, neatly wrapped in paper. He wasn’t ready to call that groceries just yet. 

**IT IS A CONVENIENT WAY TO ENTER THE BUILDING.**

“The front door is a convenient way to enter the building,” Eddie grumbled.

 **AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL.** Venom’s appreciation for scenery always took him by surprise. **ALSO YOUR CORTISOL IS DELICIOUS.** That surprised him less. 

“Seriously? You like the taste of stress?”

**AND WAKING UP. AND COFFEE. AND HORROR MOVIES. THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO PRODUCE CORTISOL.**

“Perfect, I like horror movies and coffee, too. Now can you stop making us climb to the tops of buildings? Please?”

 **HORROR MOVIES AND COFFEE ARE NOT BEAUTIFUL,** Venom pointed out.

“Beg to differ,” Eddie said, backing away from the edge. “And for the record, heights ain’t beautiful either.”

**EDDIE, WHY ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS?**

“Because we could fall and die, dumbass.”

**NOT ANYMORE.**

“It’s a deep-rooted evolution thing.”

 **OTHER HUMANS ARE NOT AFRAID,** Venom objected.

“Well, we’re a diverse species,” Eddie said drily. “What are you fishing for, childhood trauma? I been this way since before I can remember.”

**IT COULD BE FIXED,** Venom suggested. 

“You’re just saying that because you want more cortisol.” 

**YOU’RE JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE YOU’RE SCARED.**

“Fuck off. I’m not jumping.” 

**COME ON, EDDIE,** it wheedled. **I WILL NOT LET US FALL. EVEN IF WE DID FALL, I COULD FIX US. NO HARM DONE.**

“V, the image of you putting our mangled corpse back together ain't making things better,” Eddie said sharply. But dammit, it was too late, he could feel it now, real as real: blood filling their chest cavity, vertebrae shearing through their spinal cord, bones crunching, mesentery ripping, organs rupturing. He clenched his fists, digging his fingernails into his palm. 

**YOU ARE HURTING US,** Venom reprimanded. 

_No shit, Sherlock._ Eddie felt his mental barrier collapse under the flood of images. Venom hesitated. 

**IT IS NOT REAL, EDDIE.**

_It is real!_ Eddie insisted. _It is now._ He’d had intrusive thoughts about falling before, but it hadn’t been real like it was these days. Before Venom, he’d never an injury worse than a broken nose. Now he knew, in visceral detail, what it felt like to torn, crushed, stabbed. The pain was suppressed; the injury was fixed in seconds. But knowing was the worst part. 

Venom mulled this over. 

**COFFEE AND A HORROR MOVIE WOULD BE ALRIGHT,** it relented. 

Eddie stumbled backward and fumbled open the door to the stairs. They were almost at their apartment, three flights down, before their pulse started to quiet. 

**YOU WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS EVENTUALLY,** Venom reminded him. **IF YOU AVOID IT, IT WILL ONLY GET WORSE.**

Eddie drew his mental barrier back up as he unlocked the apartment door. “Fine, but next time can we just start a bit smaller?” 

**YES, LET’S GO FIND A CURB TO JUMP OFF OF.**

“Fuck off.” 

**WHAT ARE WE WATCHING?**

“How about _Alien?”_ he suggested, setting the bag of guts on the table. “Guaranteed to get the cortisol up.” 

**BECAUSE ALIENS ARE SCARY,** it asked, mildly offended. 

“I don’t know, buddy, depends if you’re plannin’ on layin’ eggs in our chest.” 

**~*~**

**WE SHOULD GET THAT OTHER KIDNEY OUT OF THE FRIDGE.**

“I thought you said you were full.” He could feel its satiety directly, too, but it seemed rude to tell Venom what it was feeling. Not that Venom would care. 

**WE ARE WATCHING A MOVIE. WE SHOULD HAVE SNACKS.**

“Fair, but can we have something other than pig guts?” He felt its skepticism. “At least not a kidney?" he amended. "They smell awful. How ‘bout liver? Liver’s not too bad.” It was weird and gelatinous, but the flavor was mild. 

**LIVER IS GOOD,** Venom conceded, hitting pause with a tendril of slime. 

“No chance of cooking it, huh?” 

**YUCK.**

“Alright, alright,” Eddie agreed. “But I’m not getting up; I’m wiped out. You go get it.” 

**FINE,** Venom said, taking control of their body. It walked them over to the fridge and pulled half a raw pig’s liver out of the fridge. 

“We need a plate for this thing. I don’t want blood dripping on the couch.” It used a goo tendril to reach across the kitchen and grab a plate off the drying rack as it walked them back to the couch. Eddie smiled. Progress. 

They sat down with their treat and hit play. 

Since discovering a fancy-ass, all-local, slaughtered-this-morning butcher shop around the corner from work, pig organs had become a regular part of their diet. The meat in that place cost a fortune, and the liver was a little pricey too on account of it actually being fit for human consumption, but the blood, head, and less desirable organs they got for next to nothing. The butcher was under the impression that Eddie made of hobby of traditional Mongolian cuisine. He had no plans to disillusion her. 

After a few minutes, Eddie cleared their throat. “V, you’re eating this, right? You know I don’t wanna eat this.” 

**RIGHT. OF COURSE.** Venom seemed vaguely chagrined. 

Eddie poked at the emotion, trying to unravel it. “Did you get absorbed in the movie and forget about your liver?” he asked suspiciously. 

**MAYBE A LITTLE,** it conceded. 

Eddie wasn’t sure what to say to that. It didn’t seem to expect anything. 

Venom coated the inside of their mouth in black, replacing teeth with fangs, taking over some localized motor functions. Eating was easier that way: Eddie still experienced it vicariously, but it was less direct. Thank God, or eating humans would be pretty fucking traumatizing. Well, it was still traumatizing, but it could be worse. 

To his surprise, Venom kept its attention on the movie and nibbled at the chunk of organ in an entirely un-Venom like way. 

**WE LIKE MOVIES,** it observed. 

Venom was still in control of their mouth, so Eddie cautiously lowered his mental barriers a little to speak directly. He had been experimenting with this half-way thing recently, and his control was improving. _No argument here, V. Movies are pretty great._

**EDDIE?** Venom asked absently, still watching Ripley. 

_Yeah?_

**ARE YOU STILL ANGRY?**

_About the auto-cannibalism?_

**OR TRYING TO GET YOU TO JUMP.**

_Nah, I was never really mad about the roof thing. I was upset, but I wasn't mad,_ Eddie clarified. _And I'm not mad about the other thing either. I get it._

He felt a gentle pressure across their back and shoulders. _Hmm?_

Without taking its attention off the movie, Venom invited him to trace its thought process. Symbiotes, despite being a social species, did not have many gestures of affection, and none meant to be shared with hosts. Humans had a multitude of warm gestures: a hug, a hand on the back, a head leaning on someone’s shoulder. It extrapolated from these. Gentle pressure said trust and comfort. It triggered pleasant neurotransmitters like serotonin and oxytocin. Improved immune system activity. Back and shoulders meant safe, not-threatening. No vulnerable organs or senses, no blood vessels close to the surface. Thicker skin with fewer nerve endings. Was it right? 

Instead of answering, Eddie reached up and pressed their fingers against their back, between the shoulder blades, and sent the idea of a smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> I can't tell you how much I appreciated the feedback on the previous part of this series! As always, concrit is greatly appreciated. If you'd rather message me in private, I'm saja-star on tumblr (not sajastar).  
> I'm working on two more installments in this little series. Not sure after that.


End file.
